


To Have and To Hold

by dancetildawnmon



Category: Supernatural
Genre: But he tries because he loves Cas obviously, Dean does not know how to be romantic, M/M, Valentine's Day
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-09-04
Updated: 2012-09-04
Packaged: 2017-11-13 12:48:20
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,120
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/503699
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dancetildawnmon/pseuds/dancetildawnmon
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It's nearing Valentine's Day, Dean is emotionally backward sometimes, and he comes up with the best plan to celebrate having Castiel in his life (and to keep Castiel in his life) while Sam makes fun of him.</p>
            </blockquote>





	To Have and To Hold

**Author's Note:**

> I really don't know okay, I wrote this for my blog wife Syra because I just really wanted her to be happy, so this happened. This isn't beta-ed and this is literally my first fic on AO3, so all mistakes are my own.

So Dean's kind of screwed. It's almost Valentine's Day and even though Cas had started out a creature of celestial intent, after spending about three years as a newly reinstated angel when they had successfully averted the Apocalypse (again), apparently he's caught on with most of Earth's dumb traditions, and Dean totally blames Sam for all of it.   
Cas' face had fallen when Dean had forgotten their "anniversary", which, okay, seriously, to be fair, was not Dean's fault entirely, since they had just finished a hunt and Team Free Will had been way too busy to remember.

Cas had given him a piece of green sea glass that he had supposedly plucked off the shoreline in Maldives.

"It reminded me of your eyes," Cas had said, blushing and and smiling hopefully.

Dean was still adjusting to the whole feelings and affection thing, even a year after Cas had first kissed him, and he hadn't understood why Cas was giving him a present. He had still given Cas a chaste peck on the cheek though, and had fallen asleep clutching the smoothened shard in his hand. Cas hadn't talked to him until two days after, and it was only after Dean had finally coaxed it our of Sam that Cas was mad because he expected Dean to give him something for their anniversary, and Dean had profusely apologised with pie and a nice languorous blow job.  

That was about three months prior, and now Dean's sitting in the Impala, drumming his fingers on the steering wheel, trying to figure out what the hell he's supposed to give his angel (and if his heart flutters at the thought of Cas being his angel, no one has to know). He's considered driving out to the Florida coast in the hope of finding blue sea glass to match Cas' eyes, but he figures that that's been done, and he needs to outdo Cas somehow. Dean still carries the piece of glass around in his jacket pocket, and he always somehow sleeps better with it on the nights Cas goes off to Heaven to do a little housekeeping. 

He concedes defeat and calls Sam up. He's in the motel and Dean's at the parking lot of a Walmart, and when Sam answers, Dean knows that he's got Bitch Face Number 5 on, the one where he pulls his brows together after being woken up from a nap. 

"Sammy, I don't know what to do for Valentine's Day and I really don't want an emo Cas again anytime soon," Dean says. Sam sighs on the other end of the line, resignation and his eye-roll evident in his "Dean, he's your boyfriend. You really shouldn't be asking me." 

"But it's your fault he's got his wings all in a frigging knot!" Dean wonders how Sam doesn't realize this yet. 

"What do you mean, 'my fault'?" Sam really needs to get with the program. It was his fault for teaching Cas the meaning of gift-giving during Christmas and birthdays. Dean tells him so and only gets a snort in response. "Look man, Cas doesn't really expect much from you--" Sam ignores Dean's indignant hey! "--so any surprise will do. I mean you're in love with him--" Sam keeps ignoring Dean's interjections "--and he's in love with you, so why don't you just, I don't know, take him somewhere you like to go, make dinner, sing him a song, whatever, just let me go back to sleep." 

"You're being such a bitch, you know that?" Dean says, rubbing his thumb between his eyebrows. Sam chuckles and says "Well at least I'm not the jerk boyfriend who can't be romantic." 

"Hey, I take offense! I can be plenty romantic, just you wait and see!" Dean really doesn't like being challenged, because he generally gets in way over his head, but he can't stop what his mouth is saying, and before he knows it, he's telling Sam that he's gonna make the most amazing Valentine's present for Cas and Cas will be swooning to Sam about it for days. Sam just says "you go do that, Dean," and ends the call with a laugh. 

Some days, Dean really hates his little brother. 

+++++++++++++++

Dean's got everything planned out for the big day, just in time for Cas' arrival back from Heaven. Cas pops in on him just as he's brushing his teeth, and when he steps out of the bathroom, he steps right into Cas' waiting arms. It's not something he admits aloud, but Dean always misses Cas when he's gone for days, and feeling the scratchy material of Cas' trench coat on his cheek makes him sigh with relief and the tension drain from his shoulders. It's always a good day when Cas comes home. 

"I missed you while I was away," Cas whispers, carding his fingers in Dean's hair and smiling. Dean kisses him them, and mumbles "me too, Cas" against his lips. 

"We're going out tonight," Dean announces, and he walks back into the bathroom, nervous already. Maybe it's cos it's been so long since he'd actually done something romantic for anyone, Lisa being the last (and he tries not to mention Lisa around Cas, because even though Cas never says anything, Dean can always see the flash of hurt in his eyes when she's brought up-- Dean knows that jealousy's a bitch) and maybe, Dean thinks as he combs through his hair,  it's because the last time he put on a suit like this had been in the presence of Bella. 

But Dean isn't going to lie to himself. He knows what the real reason is.

His hand finds the small box in his pocket and he fumbles with it, looking at his reflection in the mirror as he does so. Okay, so marriage. It's a big step. It's a fucking huge ass step, but he and Cas have known each other for seven years now, and have basically been dating for all that time, even though it's only been a year since they made it, you know, official or whatever (and by whatever, they mean fucking and kissing and all-around schmoopiness). He's figured out now that Cas has ruined heaven and braved hell and fought alongside him, has fallen for him in every possible way, and there's never going to be anyone else but him for Dean.

So. Marriage. 

Sam, the closet-case Martha Stewart that he is, had been ecstatic when Dean had come home with the ring, after pawning all the jewelry they had accumulated over time from petty thefts and winnings from hustling pool, and given him a giant moose hug. There may have been tears involved. 

Dean's kind of scared shitless because even though he knows that Cas is it, he doesn't really know how these things work, doesn't even know if Cas is allowed to get married, not because of the male vessel thing, but the whole angel-human thing. Guess he'll figure it out after he asks Cas. 

He straightens the knot on his crimson tie, winks at himself for good measure, even though his heart's ramming faster than he'd like, and steps back out of the bathroom. Cas is sitting on the bed with his legs stretched out in from of him and he looks up at Dean. His mouth drops open a fraction of an inch, and he gracefully stands up to step back into Dean's now-nonexistent personal space. 

"You look... even more beautiful than usual, Dean," Cas says, appreciative and in awe. Dean ignores the damn butterflies in his stomach and says thanks. 

Dean drives them out to this restaurant in the next town, where Dean had had to bribe the maitre d' into giving him an opening, and had to beg by explaining that he was going to propose to his boyfriend that night. Dean's not sure which one had worked, but it doesn't matter, because now they're there, getting seated at the table in a booth, and Cas is fucking beaming at Dean as if Dean had just offered him the world or something. They order steak and mashed potatoes, and Cas is looking at him funny. 

"What?" Dean mumbles around a mouthful of meat. He may be dressed all fancy but that doesn't entirely mean that he's suddenly a member of the freaking Polo Club.   
"Why did you do all of this, Dean?" Cas asks as he neatly cuts his pieces of steak. "I appreciate the sentiment, but you've never gone through this much trouble for anything before. I must admit, I am quite happy."

Dean sets his cutlery down and clears his throat. There's no going back now, he figures, and this is as good a time as any. There's soft music playing in the background, and he's never been one for grand gestures, like, ever, but here he is in a fancy restaurant in a fancy suit eating fancy dinner, and everything clicks in that moment, when Cas is looking at him levelly, questioning him with his forever unnerving stare. Dean slides out from his seat, and Cas' gaze tracks his movement from the chair to Dean getting down on one knee like every other chick flick he's ever seen. 

This is more than just a chick flick, though, because chick flicks don't involve salt rounds and resurrections and okay, maybe City of Angles counts, but come on, Nicholas Cage, really? Anyway, Dean's on his knee, and Cas looks the way he did that night in the brothel all those years ago. 

"Cas, I'm not good with words, never been good with them really, but you know that already. Like, that's the thing: you know everything there is to know about me, and I'm trying to know everything about you, and who can say that they've been to hell and back more literally than either of us? Look, Cas, it took me so long to figure it out, I know, and I'm sorry for all the times I've been a dick, but you've given up more for me than I've ever even deserved, and I'm babbling now, I know, God I keep saying I know, fuck, just... Cas, I'm in love with you, and it's really cheesy, and I feel like I'm quoting the damn Notebook here, but I love you, I've always loved you I guess, and I want you to know that I'm pretty sure I'm always going to love you, and I want you around, I always, always want you around, so Cas, by the fates and all the forces in heaven, I really hope you say yes, God help me, will you marry me?" 

Dean chokes all of this out, and he pulls the box out from his pocket, pulls it open to reveal a thick platinum band with just one tiny sapphire set in it, pulls it out of the box and holds it out, his fingers trembling. 

"I love you, please say something," Dean whispers desperately. Cas hasn't said anything, he's got tears in his eyes and now there's sapphire swimming in salt again, and finally, finally, Cas reaches out and Dean slides the ring on to his finger. 

"I cradled your soul in hell, and you carried me home from Purgatory, and I will gladly spend eternity with you, whatever plane of existence we fall into. Yes, Dean Winchester, I will marry you." 

Dean feels the electricity in his fingers, feels it in his legs as he lunges forward to capture Cas' lips in a kiss, more teeth than anything else, but the ecstatic feeling he has settling in his chest, in his toes, more than makes up for everything, including the fact that they're in public and Cas is clutching at Dean's lapels like a lifeline. The restaurant bursts into a flurry of applause all around them, and Dean sees an elderly couple smiling fondly at him as he pulls away, breathless and lightheaded. 

They walk out of the restaurant hand in hand, and there's a light drizzle out when they head to the Impala. Dean's feeling a little bit delirious, and Cas hasn't stopped smiling. They make love in the back seat, fogging the car up Titanic-style while they're parked over a cliff overlooking the city, and when Dean comes inside Cas, he grips Cas' hand in his,  feels the metal of Cas' engagement ring against his finger, and wonders why he ever thought he could be without him. 

+++++++++++++++

Cas doesn't shut up about the engagement for days, and Sam's kind of starting to get driven up the walls. When he tells Dean this, all Dean does is laugh and walk out of the room, throwing an "I told you so, you bitch!" over his shoulder.   



End file.
